PARENTING: Raising Superman

It's a bird!
It's a plane!
It's Super Stone!

This little man is over the moon about his new superman costume. One of the sweetest widows in our church, Tommie Lee, bought this for Stone this weekend. She had gifted Abigail with a necklace, and Stone looked at her like, "ummm did you forget me." A few hours later he was the proud owner of his own super hero costume.

As soon as we were home from church Sunday night, he had to put it on. He ran around this house, posing like a super hero, and making strong man sounds. Plenty of grunts from the little man.

Unfortunately - he has not had many opportunities since then to wear it. Last week parenting Abigail was...awkward. This week, parenting Stone is a full time job. I will give him credit, at school he is doing great. But at home, with mommy and daddy. Nope. We are throwing fits about everything. and I do mean EVERYTHING:

• Sister turned the tv in the playroom off. Because mommy asked her to do it. - FIT
• Sister threw away her deflated balloon. FIT - And grabbed it out of the trash and threw it back in, then stormed over to mommy saying Abigail threw it away (as if she wasn't supposed to).
• Mommy selected clothes to wear to school - FIT - wanted to stay in bear pajamas all day.
• Asked to finish the food he himself picked out - FIT
• Sister asked for a banana for breakfast - FIT
• Daddy said go to your room so we can talk - FIT

If it wasn't so frustrating it might be comical. A friend actually posted last night, "Please convince my husband that toddlers throw fits over the most RIDICULOUS things...." then proceeded to comment why her toddler son threw a fit. Almost 10 other parents shared the ridiculous things that caused toddler fits in their house.

This is not a new season for us. Abigail was 22 months old when Stone was born, and at about her 2 1/2 year mark I do remember constant frustration of trying to get her to stop throwing fits - mainly because they made Stone (then about 8 months) start a crying fit. We survived that chapter with her and we will with him. Currently he has lost the privilege of tv and videos. This week my children are not allowed to watch cartoons, movies, or short video clips. Period.

Yes, even Abigail. There is no way possible to allow her the privilege without more fits from Stone. And, she honestly doesn't seem to mind. Last night was rather enjoyable (minus Stone's fits). While he had his super hero costume on, she grabbed just about every princess/fairy/elf costume she had and they dressed up all evening. Both bedrooms and the play room were a hot mess - but for the most part they were happy and playing. I always seemed amazed what my children do when the tv is turned off. If it wasn't so wet outside from all the rain this past weekend, and the mosquito's weren't in massive armies I would send them outside. They love playing with chalk, sliding the slide, playing with blocks/trucks, and looking for rollie pollies. Letting them use their imagination is a wonderful thing.

This morning Brock & I had to talk with Stone that if his fits do not stop, he will lose more of his belongings. We have done this with Abigail before, and we have not had to repeat the experience with her. Just a mention and her behavior improves. I remember it clearly. She was just a tyrant with her fits so we took everything out:

• toys
• dollhouse
• books
• rocking chair
• decorative pillows
• art work
• and the playroom closed

She had her bed, her pillow, her sheet and comforter, a lamp, and her sound machine. And in time (about a 2 week period) she earned her items back. She was polite, she did "chores", she got good reports from school. And like I said, we have not had to repeat the process since.

I hope we don't have to go to that extreme with Stone. and it is purely vanity. When we removed everything from her room, all of her stuff went into our room - the only place she could not get into to play with it. And if we do it to him, I see it all going into my room. But, if we have to, we will do it. The Bible is filled with verses on parenting, commands to do it, the blessings of biblical parenting. My husband and I take God's word to heart. We know that we are not raising Stone to be a good boy. We are raising him to be a young man, who serves God and his community.

• Psalms 127:3-5 Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.
• Ephesians 6:1-3 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.”
• Deuteronomy 6:6-9 And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.
• Proverbs 1:8-9 Hear, my son, your father’s instruction, and forsake not your mother’s teaching, for they are a graceful garland for your head and pendants for your neck.
• Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.
• Proverbs 13:24 Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.
• Proverbs 19:18 Discipline your son, for there is hope; do not set your heart on putting him to death.
• Proverbs 23:13-14 (KJV) Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell.