Showing posts with label private. Show all posts
Showing posts with label private. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 22, 2018

UPDATE: Movie Warning

If you are not sure what this is in response to, please read my post from yesterday. Movie Warning
At the end of my post I indicated that I would be writing Focus on the Family: Plugged In Movie Review about their 4 out 5 rating for the movie Show Dogs. Below you will find my email to them:

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To Whom it May Concern,
 
I am concerned about the rating your establishment gave the movie Show Dogs. It was rated a 4 out 5 for family friendliness. As a mother of two young children, and a 3rd on the way, I use your site to help guide me in what we as a family watch. I have found previously your ratings to be spot on.
 
But with the movie Show Dogs, I think you were too generous. Many of the mom's I am friends with shared on social media a troubling review that essentially says the movie is trying to normalize the grooming for sexual predators. Here is the link to the article:
The movie, from your site's review, would have been one my husband gladly would have taken my 3 year old to see. My husband is a police office, my son talks nothing but about good guys, bad guys, trucks, and dogs. This movie has 3 of his 4 must have's as a 3 year old boy. I am disturbed that your review summarized this troubling scenario mentioned above as:
 
Sexual Content
Some of the female dog handlers wear formfitting, low-cut outfits. A male handler ushers in his dog while shirtless. A trainer offers to let Max breed with his dog. Frank repeatedly cups Max's nether regions (off- camera) to prepare him for the judge's on-stage inspection of him. Max and another female show dog share a "kiss," à la that iconic canine canoodle in Lady and the Tramp.

I don't care that it is off screen. The fact that it is discussed apparently as it is, is appalling. Your conclusion, that this a "kids movie through and through" could not be further from the truth. I have always revered your site, as many women who I look up to relied on your site to help guide them in their parenting. I now can no longer use your site as the guiding site in movie decisions for my family.
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Sometimes, when you take on a task for standing up for yourself, or in this case the innocence of your children, you wonder if it is worth it. Will they even respond? Will they brush it off? In this case, it was worth my time to not only write my original post, but to write Focus on the Family. They did in fact respond to my email, and publicly responded to the outpouring from parents I would assume nation wide. Below is their email response to me:
 
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Thank you, Jessica, for writing to Plugged In, a ministry of Focus on the Family. Your message was forwarded to us here in our Family Help Center, and I’m happy to get back to you.
Your confidence in our ministry means a great deal to us. It was good you took the time to share your disappointment about our Plugged In staff’s recent review of Show DogsWe appreciate the opportunity to respond to the issues you raised and address the content in the movie that you feel needed more attention in the initial review. A blog by Bob Hoose, our staff member who saw the screening, is now posted on the Plugged In website. We believe you’ll find what Bob has to say beneficial. We also want to let you know that some changes are being made to the review in response to the feedback we’ve received.

As a final thought, we want to emphasize again something Bob stated in his post. Focus takes the subject of child abuse extremely seriously. In fact, in April we aired a broadcast on the topic titled “Protecting Your Child from Sexual Abuse” in order to ensure that parents and other caregivers are alert to this problem and have the tools they need to guard the innocence of those under their supervision. If you didn’t hear this program at the time, we hope you’ll take several minutes to listen via the link above.

Again, we’re glad you contacted us and hope we’ve provided some helpful clarification. May God bless you and your loved ones.
Mia Jones
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I am glad I did receive a response. And I am encouraged that they are responding to the fact that many people, parents, thought the review was lacking. I did take the time to read the blog by Bob Hoose, the staff member who saw the screening. And for the most part I like his response, but some things still irked me. Case in point.
 
The movie is about a police dog that goes undercover as a contestant in a show dog competition. And as part of the process, the judges have to inspect the animal’s private parts (that’s a part of real dog shows, by the way). Since Max the cop dog has never been through this process, his human trainer tries to prepare him for being examined in that way—much to Max’s chagrin. They tell him to try not to think about it and go to his “zen” place. It’s played as a growl and snap joke in the movie.
 
I honestly do not care if an inspection of animal private parts is how it is done in real life, I feel that Focus on the Family is missing the point. This part of the movie didn't need to be in the movie. How can I teach my child about her private box (PARENTING: Hard Work and Worth It!), and that it is private, when a movie makes light of it, and that part seems to be glossed over by reviewers. Now Mr. Hoose is right, people view life/movies/music through their own filter of experience. Like Mrs. Maldonado, I am a survivor of sexual abuse, and I am somewhat hyper vigilant to scenarios like this in movies, the news, books. But, I don't think that we necessarily saw this through that survivor's filter. We saw it through the filter of being mom's who are well aware and highly informed about what is going on in society. Honestly, anything made by Hollywood, I am suspicious of. Sexual scandals abound more and more we hear about the abuses going on, and everything that comes from Hollywood is over sexualized. I still do not understand at the age of 32 what a half naked woman or man has to do with selling perfume. 
 
Mr. Hoose shared: As I was writing this blog, a colleague of mine took a phone call on the issue. The caller—a mom—had some concerns about the review. Once we explained what we try to do in our reviews, including this one, she understood, and she added that the whole controversy actually inspired her to talk with her own kids about sexual abuse. That’s a wonderful reaction, I think. Whatever take we have on this movie, whether we see it or not, I applaud Maldonado for talking with her own children about these very important topics the movie made her consider. I applaud our caller for—even though neither she  nor her children had seen the movie at all—opening up this line of dialogue in her own family. Whatever the movie’s intent was, these are important conversations to have. And safe kids and safe families are definitely on the top of both our lists.

I do agree with this, this movie is giving families an open venue to have this difficult conversation. I am still not appeased though with the nonchalant feeling about the scenes in question. And I might have to resolve myself to this fact. I know my family will not be seeing this movie, and based on the comments to my post on Facebook, and the private messages I have received, many in my circle of friends and community will not be seeing it either. And that might just have to be enough, for now.

Monday, May 21, 2018

Movie Warning

I am not a helicopter mom by any means. My kids do not have me hovering over them all day every day. I let them breathe, I let them learn, I let them play, I let them have consequences. I am not raising them to stay my babies forever, but to become responsible adults who not only will function in society but contribute in a positive manner.

And part of that is sheltering them from some of the ills of the world. As they get older it is harder and harder (and I say that with them being only 3 and 5). I know I cannot wrap them in bubble wrap and isolate them. They have to be exposed to humanity and society to some degree so that when they are no longer under my roof they don't rebel and become trouble makers ransacking society. But, at this young age, there are still many things they do not need to be exposed to. In time we will have conversations, but when they are old enough and mature enough - and for each child that will vary. Boys and Girls age/mature differently, so a conversation I have with my daughter at age 9 might not happen until age 11 with my son.

This is not my normal post. We do watch movies, my husband and I, and we do let our kids watch movies. Princess's, super hero's, Disney classics, Bible stories, it runs the gauntlet on what my littles can watch. They don't watch a movie every day, we have dedicated play time, book time, and weather permitting, we send them outside to get hot and sweaty, and a bit stinky. My daughter has gone to the theater 3 times now, my son twice. It is a treat, and one we try to make happen in the summer for sure, to break up the routine a bit. When it comes to the movies we go to, my husband and I try to pick one that we ourselves will enjoy, but that the kids will understand.

I heard about a movie yesterday, that from the outside looking in, we totally would have taken our kids to! The movie is called "Show Dogs." IMDB gives this description of the movie:

Max, a macho, solitary Rottweiler police dog is ordered to go undercover as a primped show dog in a prestigious Dog Show, along with his human partner, to avert a disaster from happening.
IMDB: Show Dogs

It sounds super fun, and I know my 3 year old would love it: police and dogs! It is right up his alley!

But the article I read yesterday paints a different light on the movie, and it is something that cannot be ignored:

It all started out fine, she says:
“The premise is great for a kids movie.  Max is a talking police dog (voiced by Ludacris) who is paired up with a human partner, Frank (Will Arnett) to infiltrate a prestigious dog show and rescue a kidnapped baby panda.  Being a tough dog from New York, Max has no business competing in a dog show but uses his street smarts to outperform the competition to get closer to the inner circle of kidnappers.  Along the way, Max learns lessons about trust and the need to accept help from others.  The usual hilarity ensues with dog farts, bites on the rear-end, and slap-stick bonks to the head which elicit giggles from the audience. “
It’s when Max the police dog learns what he has to do to truly go undercover and be accepted as a legitimate show dog that the trouble with this movie starts. WHAT does Max (and apparently all the show dogs) have to submit to?
Having his private parts touched and inspected. Yep. Maldonado continues:
“What could have been solely a fun movie for kids that would get my highest recommendation is damaged by a dark and disturbing message hidden, not so subtly between the fluffy dogs and glamorous parties of the show dog lifestyle.  As part of any dog show, contestants are judged on their abilities and physical attributes.  One part, in particular, is the inspection of the dog’s private parts.”
Max, of course, is  NOT cool with this, and when his partner Frank and a former champion show dog try to get him to accept this process, a certain dark and very dangerous theme for kids emerges. Maldonado explains:
“Since the inspection of the private parts will happen in the finals, Frank touches Max’s private parts to get him use to it.  Of course, Max doesn’t like it and snaps at Frank for him to stop.  Max is then told by the former champion, who has been through the process before, that he needs to go to his “zen place” while it happens so he can get through it.  More attempts are made by Frank to touch Max’s private parts, but Max is still having trouble letting it happen and keeps snapping at him.”
Max needs to get it together, see, and LET PEOPLE TOUCH HIS PRIVATE PARTS, or he might lose the competition and fail at his mission to rescue the kidnapped panda.
Do you see what’s happening here? Max’s success is riding on whether or not he lets both his partner (for practice) and a stranger (the competition judge) touch his private parts.
IN A KIDS MOVIE. WHAT???
Newsflash, folks: THIS IS CALLED GROOMING and it’s what sexual predators do to kids!
It gets worse. Maldonado describes the movie’s dramatic dog show finals scene:
The day of the finals come and if Max doesn’t let his private parts be touched, he may lose the competition and any hope of finding the kidnapped panda.  It all rests on his ability to let someone touch his private parts.  The judge’s hands slowly reach behind Max and he goes to his “zen place”.  He’s flying through the sky, dancing with his partner, there are fireworks and flowers-everything is great-all while someone is touching his private parts.
So a stranger touches Max’s privates and it MUST feel good because Max has gone to his happy place while being fondled.
UMMM. NO.
Maldonado saw the movie with not only her kids, but her husband and her mother too. After the movie, all three adults felt uncomfortable with the “private parts” stuff. She says:
During the movie, I kept thinking, “This is wrong, it doesn’t need to be in a kids movie. Everything else in the movie is good fun except for this.”  Afterward, my husband mentioned that he picked up on this message too, as did my mother who saw the movie with us.  Dog Show Movie Review
Numerous mom friends of mine on social media have been sharing the warning not to take your children to this movie. And I have to concur. I was curious though what Focus on the Family: Plugged In Movie Review had to say. I was shocked.

Conclusion
Show Dogs is a kids' movie through and through. If you consider its story and presentation on a graduated scale—say, one that ranges from whine and scratch on the low end all the way up to a family pleasing tail-wag peak—this pic probably qualifies as a Saturday-matinee chew toy that lands on the less-enthusiastic, flea-bitten side of the scale. It feels like a talking-dog version of Miss Congeniality: a canine caper the youngsters will giggle at even as parents roll their eyes wearily.
On the plus side, it actually has plenty of action and less doggy doo-doo humor than I expected. And in the negative column, there are some extended dog-private-parts-inspection moments and a couple uses of the word "d--n" that really should have been left on the cutting room floor.
Your kids will likely think it's silly and fun. But whatever you do, I'd suggest you leave your family dog at home. 'Cause he'd never forgive you.  Plugged In: Show Dogs

They gave the movie a 4 out 5 for family friendliness. I really am shocked. I visit their site to get an idea of movies my husband and I are considering for our kids, and I feel this is a major letdown. All they shared about the above is this:

Sexual Content

Some of the female dog handlers wear formfitting, low-cut outfits. A male handler ushers in his dog while shirtless. A trainer offers to let Max breed with his dog. Frank repeatedly cups Max's nether regions (off-camera) to prepare him for the judge's on-stage inspection of him. Max and another female show dog share a "kiss," à la that iconic canine canoodle in Lady and the Tramp.

They summarize the grooming of a "person" to accept fondling by another in one sentence. I am sorry, but that is wrong. My family and I will NOT be seeing this movie, and I plan on writing to Focus on the Family and letting them know that this movie is not appropriate for anyone, but ESPECIALLY children.

While my children are young, and I make a majority of decisions for them, I will do what I can to shelter them from thinking things like this are normal.

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