Life

When you are told at age 14 that the likelihood of you having a child of your own would more than likely be impossible, and somehow you manage to give birth to three beautiful children, you thank the LORD - daily! I believe my children are a gift from God. I love them, I discipline them, I cherish them.

Psalm 127:3  (NASB)

Behold, children are a gift of the Lord,

The fruit of the womb is a reward.

I have been blessed with three beautiful children. 

Abigail is my mini-me, my mother hen, my helper, my sister. This past December she accepted Jesus as her LORD and Savior and was baptized 6 years to the day of her dedication. 

My middle child, Stone, is my nugget (his self appointed nickname). He is my cuddler, my stubborn one, my momma's boy. He is a go-getter, full of energy and has the world's mots amazing imagination. 

My newest, my 4 month old, is Ari. He is the happiest baby on earth. He smiles so big, he laughs, and is such an easy baby. He is our baby we did not know that we needed, and our life is now complete with him in it.

My husband and I have had our children in church almost from the first Sunday they were able to attend after their birth. Regular church attendance is the routine of our life, Sunday's and Wednesday's. Not only that, but we have made the sacrifice to put our children in a Christian school where they are taught the Bible everyday, and attend chapel once a week. Now our youngest is in a daycare, but Christian principals are apart of the curriculum there, so he too is being poured into. We want our children growing up on the foundation of Christ's word. It is the only way to endure through this fallen and broken world. 

Proverbs 22:6  (NASB) 

Train up a child in the way he should go,

Even when he is old he will not depart from it.

Dec. 16, 2018 - Baby dedication of Ari Matthew Shuman

Children are a gift and a responsibility, God's word tells us that. Brock and I take both concepts seriously. We know that everyone parents differently, and sees to life in their own ways. But thankfully the friends in our lives all hold true to the same core concepts of faith and life. So we are surrounded by people who are like minded. 

I share all this because heavy on my heart is the legislation that was passed in New York a few weeks back. The most horrific anti-life bill was passed, allowing abortion up to the moment of birth. And since then, the true depravity of many of our nations leaders has come to light. Some legislators want to give a mother the option to murder their child after the child has been born.

My little loves on
Valentine's Day 2019

Folks, our country, our world is in trouble. Women want the right to kill their own children at any point. Or at least that is what the legislators have said. My heart shakes at the idea that there are women out there who truly want this. But....the legislators are men and women, fathers and mothers, grandparents...The condition of their hearts....it is so heartbreaking. And I know that there really are women who want this "right." Every year, on the anniversary of Roe v. Wade women march for the right to kill their unborn child. The depravity of that shakes me to the core. 

Luckily, women and men are standing up for life. There is always a counter march that is pro-life. And the numbers for this grow each year. There is hope, but we believers must get on our knees and pray. That is what keeps coming to mind when the news comes out with more laws being proposed to kill babies, or stories about planned parenthood and their horrible practices. 

PRAY

We must pray. Men and women. Life is not a woman issue, it is a human issue. Men need to stand up and speak up - it's their children too that are being murdered. I remember the night I heard about what New York had done. I held my baby boy and just looked at him, and I held him a bit longer before I placed him to sleep in his crib.

I remember giving birth to all three of my children, and to think people want to make it okay to murder a baby up until (and possibly after) birth. The first time I held all my children is a moment I cherish. That feeling, the adrenaline, the rush! Oh the emotions that rush over you. Just typing that up, I can recall the surge of love and emotions.

There needs to be a change. The fact of the matter is, America is going to be called to judgement for the number of innocent lives we have allowed to be slaughtered in the name of "progress" and "women's rights." The land of our country is stained by the blood of the millions of babies who have been murdered in the womb. Blood must be atoned for by blood.

Psalm 106:38 (NASB)

And shed innocent blood,

The blood of their sons and their daughters,

Whom they sacrificed to the idols of Canaan;

And the land was polluted with the blood.

God takes serious the shedding of innocent blood, His word is filled with references:

•  Deuteronomy 19:10 So innocent blood will not be shed in the midst of your land which the Lord your God gives you as an inheritance, and bloodguiltiness be on you.
• Deuteronomy 19:13 You shall not pity him, but you shall purge the blood of the innocent from Israel, that it may go well with you.
• Deuteronomy 21:8 Forgive Your people Israel whom You have redeemed, O Lord, and do not place the guilt of innocent blood in the midst of Your people Israel.’ And the bloodguiltiness shall be forgiven them.
• Deuteronomy 21:9 So you shall remove the guilt of innocent blood from your midst, when you do what is right in the eyes of the Lord.
• 1 Samuel 19:5 For he took his life in his hand and struck the Philistine, and the Lord brought about a great deliverance for all Israel; you saw it and rejoiced. Why then will you sin against innocent blood by putting David to death without a cause?”
• 2 Samuel 3:28 Afterward when David heard it, he said, “I and my kingdom are innocent before the Lord forever of the blood of Abner the son of Ner.
• 2 Kings 21:16 Moreover, Manasseh shed very much innocent blood until he had filled Jerusalem from one end to another; besides his sin with which he made Judah sin, in doing evil in the sight of the Lord.
• 2 Kings 24:4 and also for the innocent blood which he shed, for he filled Jerusalem with innocent blood; and the Lord would not forgive.
• Proverbs 1:11 If they say, “Come with us, Let us lie in wait for blood, Let us ambush the innocent without cause;
• Proverbs 6:17 Haughty eyes, a lying tongue, And hands that shed innocent blood,
• Isaiah 59:7 Their feet run to evil, And they hasten to shed innocent blood; Their thoughts are thoughts of iniquity, Devastation and destruction are in their highways.
• Jeremiah 7:6 if you do not oppress the alien, the orphan, or the widow, and do not shed innocent blood in this place, nor walk after other gods to your own ruin,
• Jeremiah 19:4 Because they have forsaken Me and have made this an alien place and have burned sacrifices in it to other gods, that neither they nor their forefathers nor the kings of Judah had ever known, and because they have filled this place with the blood of the innocent
• Jeremiah 22:3 Thus says the Lord, “Do justice and righteousness, and deliver the one who has been robbed from the power of his oppressor. Also do not mistreat or do violence to the stranger, the orphan, or the widow; and do not shed innocent blood in this place.
• Jeremiah 22:17 “But your eyes and your heart Are intent only upon your own dishonest gain, And on shedding innocent blood And on practicing oppression and extortion.”
• Jeremiah 26:15 Only know for certain that if you put me to death, you will bring innocent blood on yourselves, and on this city and on its inhabitants; for truly the Lord has sent me to you to speak all these words in your hearing.”
• Joel 3:19 Egypt will become a waste, And Edom will become a desolate wilderness, Because of the violence done to the sons of Judah, In whose land they have shed innocent blood.
• Jonah 1:14 Then they called on the Lord and said, “We earnestly pray, O Lord, do not let us perish on account of this man’s life and do not put innocent blood on us; for You, O Lord, have done as You have pleased.”
• Matthew 27:4 saying, “I have sinned by betraying innocent blood.” But they said, “What is that to us? See to that yourself!”
• Matthew 27:24 When Pilate saw that he was accomplishing nothing, but rather that a riot was starting, he took water and washed his hands in front of the crowd, saying, “I am innocent of this Man’s blood; see to that yourselves.”

Shedding innocent blood is a sin, it separates us from the blessings and full life God has for us. Can God forgive us, as a nation, for the millions of babies who have died? Yes. We as a nation though must turn the laws around, make it a crime again in this country to kill a baby. Then and only then can we start to see God's forgiveness.

2019 WORDS: Trust & Intentional

Ahhh, the new year! Goals, plans, new focus.

Many people make resolutions to improve their lives, some claim a Bible verse to live by, and others focus on a word to be the lighthouse of their year.

Through my 33 years I have done all of these, but never consistently. This year God put on my heart a word, well, actually two. One word is for my  vertical realtionship (heavenly), the other is for my horizontal relationships (earthly).

When it comes to my relationship with the LORD, He is continuing to tell me to TRUST Him. Trust His plan for my life, Trust Him with our finances, Trust Him with my children, Trust Him and His word. The Holy Spirit is guiding me with this by continually putting the old hymn in my mind:

Trust and Obey

John H. Sammis, 1887

When we walk with the Lord in the light of His Word,

What a glory He sheds on our way!

While we do His good will, He abides with us still,

And with all who will trust and obey.

Refrain:

Trust and obey, for there’s no other way

To be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.

Not a shadow can rise, not a cloud in the skies,

But His smile quickly drives it away;

Not a doubt or a fear, not a sigh or a tear,

Can abide while we trust and obey.

Not a burden we bear, not a sorrow we share,

But our toil He doth richly repay;

Not a grief or a loss, not a frown or a cross,

But is blessed if we trust and obey.

But we never can prove the delights of His love

Until all on the altar we lay;

For the favor He shows, for the joy He bestows,

Are for them who will trust and obey.

Then in fellowship sweet we will sit at His feet,

Or we’ll walk by His side in the way;

What He says we will do, where He sends we will go;

Never fear, only trust and obey.

I grew up with this old hymn, and it speaks to my heart. Trust and Obey - Trust God, Obey His commands. This is how we are to live our life. How to live the Christian life.

Then there are my earthly relationships. I am working on being more intentional.

• Looking people in the eye when I speak to them
• Saying a person's name when I am talking to them
• putting my phone away when someone is talking to me
• Praying immediately when someone tells me a need
• Reaching out to my friends
• Writing down what people say to me, and following up on events they attend, or projects they complete.

By being intentional, I am investing in my relationships. I am making them more personal. I am getting to know those in my life better. I am proving that I care.

To Gather: why?

Every August the church I attend has a "Promotion" Sunday. The students move up to the next grade, just as the new school year begins. Most adults stay in the same class, but it is generally a time to make a change to a new class if one were to do it.

My class leader did a lesson that day this past August on why we gather. She prepared us ahead of time that we would be discussing why we gather, so we had "answers" prepared.

• fellowship
• accountability
• Bible lessons
• child free time

A good mix of "church" answers and open hearts. And my teacher agreed with all of these, but, she said the main reason we SHOULD gather as a class is because God's word tells us to.

Hebrews 10:25 New American Standard Bible (NASB)

25 not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near.

Let's break this down:

1. Believers must not forsake gathering together. Those who are focused on walking in faith will not let themselves be isolated. We must be with those whose focus is the spreading of the Gospel and Kingdom work.
2. Our gathering together is to be an encouragement. How can we encourage each other:
1. Prayer
2. A listening ear
3. Sometimes just by faithfully showing up.
3. URGENCY
1. The last part, "all the more as you see the day drawing near" tells us that the closer we get to the end of the Church Age we need to gather more.We need to gather so we can stay strong, we can pray for each other, we can affirm God's will. 

As we were discussing this last part of the verse, a lady asked if the word gather (assembling) is the same as what is talked about in 1 Thessalonians 4:17:

1 Thessalonians 4:16-17 New American Standard Bible (NASB)

16 For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. 17 Then we who are alive and remain will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we shall always be with the Lord.

My class leader was not sure, so I looked into it. Strongs Concordance says that caught (G726) is Greek, harpazo: to seize, catch away, pluck.  

The assembly from Hebrews is Greek (G1997), episynagoge: a complete collection, a meeting for worship.

So no, they are not the same. But this study has kept me thinking of the day that is to come. And the gathering that will occur soon. Friends, if you have watched the news you know things are getting bad. 

• abortion up to birth in NY (many other states trying to follow suit)
• Little boys becoming "queens" and posing with grown "queens" who are basically nude, and it being applauded
• 5 year old boys being "allowed" to to transition to female, encouraged by their transgender dad (identifies as a woman) and mom
• diseases almost eradicated in the United States making a comeback (measles and mumps)
• investigations into abuses by the Catholic church of children
• The Pope admitting that clergy abused nun's in the Catholic church
• The Southern Baptist Convention being investigated/called out for letting those accused (and sometimes found) of abuse to remain in positions of authority
• so many stories of mothers killing their children (and I am not talking about abortion)

And these stories are just in the past 2-3 weeks. Its appalling how bad things are getting, and more and more of believers are looking up. The depravity of this broken world is making our hearts call out to our Father.We are longing to be gathered up at the trumpet call. But until then, lets gather together here on earth. Let's share the Gospel, encourage each other, and continue to pray.

Reflecting on Those Who Have Gone Before

In the past few weeks many people I know have lost loved ones, friends and family. And for a few that I know it has been several people. And it makes me sad. We are to mourn when others mourn (Romans 12:5), so it is fitting that I am saddened by those around me in mourning.

But there is a hope in all this. Many who have passed were known to be believers. So while their bodies died, their souls are with Jesus. One scenario in particular is that of someone I know wanting to attend the funerals of two people close to them, but the funerals are/were on the same day, one in Texas, the other in Florida, at the same time So an impossible situation. But he honored the one who could not attend by honoring a request of the family. And this had me thinking about the few funerals I have missed the past few years.

Mrs. Schnieder...a feisty 80+ woman in the church. Oh she was a spitfire. She lamented that women no longer wore gloves and hats to church, but confessed that she knew it was more important that people came to church, no matter what they wore. I remember sitting beside her on Wednesday nights and hearing the stories of her and her husband moving from Nebraska, their camping trips, the time when her daughter(and family) lived in Hawaii, to searching for geode's. And she would share scriptures that she felt I needed to know. I don't even recall why I could not attend her funeral, but I look forward to seeing her beyond the pearly gates when the time comes.

My cousin Jesse. This one was hard, he died so young, in his 30's. I loved him dearly, was close to him when I was younger. In fact, for a while I lived with him and his wife while they were pregnant with their first daughter.

And thinking on this, has me recalling Hebrew 11 through 12:1. The genealogy of faith, those who hoped for a day to come, who has righteousness counted unto them. I am looking at the world around me right now, the chaos, disorder, hatred, and wondering how much more has to go wrong before God calls us here on earth home. How much longer until we are reunited with all who have already gone home? There is no answer, we do not know, but we need to live in anticipation. We need to look forward to the day that is to yet come like Abraham, Sarah, Jacob, Israel and some many others did before us.

Relating to Pregnancy

For those who know me personally (or have read this blog for at least the past year), you know that I have been pregnant.

Just yesterday I came home from the hospital, now a mother of 3 (1 daughter, 2 sons). Overall I enjoy motherhood, I love watching my children grow, learn, discover. Discipline is not fun, but it is vital, and luckily at this stage  almost 6, 4, nb) discipline means no tv, or no special toys.

Pregnancy on the other hand - it is hard, even brutal at times (and I am not talking about labor just yet). Each of my four pregnancies were different (1 miscarriage last year). Very little was similar from one to another. Weight gain was different, nausea/vomiting happened in all, but to very varied degrees, leg cramps, hip/back aches...oye! But no matter what, a pregnancy that goes to term will have the end result of labor, and of course, a baby.

The labor part has been on my mind lately, obviously due to the fact that I was going to go through the experience. But I was not just thinking about the personal physical aspect of labor. I have been in awe on how God uses the labor/birth process in scripture to convey the end times, how the world will labor before the Rapture and Tribulation.

Matthew 24:8 - "But all these things are merely the beginning of birth pangs.

Mark 13:8 - "For nation will rise up against nation, and kingdom against kingdom; there will be earthquakes in various places; there will also be famines. These things are merely the beginning of birth pangs.

1 Thessalonians 5:3- While they are saying, "Peace and safety!" then destruction will come upon them suddenly like labor pains upon a woman with child, and they will not escape.

Revelation 12:2 - and she was with child; and she cried out, being in labor and in pain to give birth.

I feel now, that women of faith, female followers of Christ, who have birthed can relate to this portion of God's word unlike anyone else. It doesn't matter if you had a vaginal or c-section birth. In the weeks leading up to the baby arriving, a woman's body aches, it hurts, it practices the real ordeal. All of those are the beginning of birth pangs. For the past 2 1/2 weeks I have been miserable. Unable to sleep, always uncomfortable, lacking focus, constantly wondering if this was the real ordeal, nauseated and even vomiting. Not a pretty pregnancy glow to be seen (not sure if I ever had one).

And here's the other thing, why God is absolutely brilliant with His details, there are still pains after the baby is born. The woman's body has to return to it's pre-pregnancy state, go back to "normal." And it takes time. The body doesn't spring back right away (yes we all know that one woman  - she is a unicorn). I am 3 days out from giving birth, and having my easiest experience by far and I look 3 to 4 month pregnant, waiting for my milk to fully come in, things are still swollen, and at most getting 3 1/2 hours of sleep at a time.

The Rapture is when God calls the Church home, and from my studies in Revelation 12, we (the Church) are what the woman gives birth to. And after the Church is birthed to heaven, in a manner of time judgement comes upon the earth. Some of the judgement are focused on the remaining humanity, but a good deal of the judgement falls on the earth itself. Those of who die or are caught up, the world we return to when Jesus has his 2nd coming, will not be the world we left behind. It is going to be drastically changed, through painful means. And just like a woman who has given birth, whose body will never bee 100% back to what it was, I believe we will recognize the world we return to, it will be familiar, but for sure, it will not be the same. And that there is another beauty of a relationship with Christ. We are never the same after we come to know Him. Come to a personal relationship with Him. The shell we have will stay the same, but become softer, we will carry with us His fragrance, the sweet aroma of salvation (to those who want pursue a relationship with Him, to others it will be a repugnant stench), but most importantly the work He will do on our hearts, on our inside will have us being a 180 of who we use to be.

I want to leave you with the song by Lauren Daigle - You Say. Remember who you are in Christ, the world is chaotic right now, there is very little left that needs to happen for the Church to be called home. Live each day faithfully unto the LORD. God bless.

What time is it?

Many people are curious about the end times. Not just believers, but secular people too. Look at Hollywood in the past ten years or so. There are many movies that have been made with an end times bent. Do any of the movies hold true to scripture? Not really, but having studied Revelation, 1 & 2 Thessalonians, Daniel, the Gospel, certain parts of certain movies get really close. Which is why if I

happen to watch a movie that is close to what scripture says will happen, my heart aches, and skips a beat.

I am not afraid to share my opinions on things. Especially scripture. Once upon a time it was politics, but scripture...that took over, as it should have. With what I have studied the past few years, I have a responsibility to share God's word, and what is to come.Sometimes I think I scare other believers with my opinions. With my beliefs.

I am not a date setter, I want to make that clear. But I strongly, even passionately, believe we (the world, society...humanity) are in the last seconds of the Church Age. That literally any minute the trumpet will sound, and:

For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. 17 Then we who are alive and remain will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we shall always be with the Lord. 18 Therefore comfort one another with these words. 1 Thessalonian 4:16-18

I have read scripture, I have seen the prophecy's and I have seen world history. And I am waiting. I am living life thankful for everyday, doing my best to live for Christ, to share His message, to be a fragrance in the world:

2 Corinthians 2:15  (NASB)

15 For we are a fragrance of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing;

Everyday I have on earth, means that Jesus has not called His Bride home. But I do believe that it will happen soon. That God will not wait any longer, that He will finally have enough and pour out His wrath on a world, but first will remove those who have endured to the end.

Here are somethings I want you to consider, if you think I have lost my mind about my beliefs.

The Bible tells us many things about what will precede the return of Jesus Christ:

1. It will be a time when knowledge and transportation have greatly increased (Daniel 12:4)

2. Wickedness will be rampant as it was in the days of Noah (Matthew 24:37-38)

3. Homosexuality will be rampant (Luke 17:28-29)

4. Adultery, material greed, and the killing of innocent life will be commonplace (Revelation 17-18)

5. The Gospel will have been preached to all nations (Matthew 24:14)

6. Many false religious leaders and false prophets will have arisen (Matthew 24:23-25)

7. Earthquakes, disease, and famine would be widespread (Luke 21:11)

8. There will be many wars and rumors of war (Mark 13:7)

9. There will be a Jewish holocaust (Ezekiel 37:1-14)

10. Followed by Israel's return as a nation (Ezekiel 37:11-12)

11. Israel's pure language, Hebrew, will return to the land (Zephaniah 3:9)

12. The Ethiopian Jews will return to Israel (Zephaniah 3:10-11)

13. The Russian and European Jews will return to Israel (Jeremiah 23:7-8)

14. The Roman Empire will be revived, but will only be a confederacy (Daniel 2:40-43)

15. Many believers will fall away (1 Timothy 4:1-3)

16. And perhaps the most shocking prophecy can be found in 2 Timothy 3:1-7:

But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come.  For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good, treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of god; holding to a form of godliness, although they have denied its power; always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.

These prophecies have already been fulfilled—just in this past century, in fact.  Many just in the last few decades.  The Bible's apocalyptic prophecies are being fulfilled right now, for the first time in history.  It is actually happening.  Open your eyes while there is still time.  

From Unsealed.com:
What is to come:
The world is in a very real way falling apart. The day is upon us when the world will look like this:

• Millions have disappeared creating disaster, chaos, heart break and confusion.
• Some say Christ came and took His followers, although their voices are being drowned out by those who say otherwise.
• Millions of churchgoers who have been left, say it must have been something else.
• Cultists, spiritualists and the self-righteous will proclaim "anything but God," but they will be anything but right.
• Many will believe a deception of one flavor or another.  Perhaps the CERN particle accelerator opened a wormhole in the time-space continuum.   Still others will say it was aliens.
• When the Church is taken up, Satan and his demonic fallen angels will be cast down to the earth, with power, beauty and answers.  We suppose they will masquerade as aliens with answers.  Aliens they are, but aliens cast out of heaven and not from Krypton.  Their objective is to wreak havoc, before they are sentenced to hell and take as many with them as they can.  
• Everyone wants a cute-little-friendly-helpful-E.T.-phone-home-Close-Encounters alien friend.  That's not what they'll find.  Even Stephen Hawking was wary of contact with aliens.
• I speculate many will say these "aliens" have come to solve the world's problems and for a time it will seem as though they have.
• In the midst of the racial, moral, political, poverty and homelessness tensions, and amid anarchy, war, death, rape, murder, economic and ecological collapse, violence, and polarization, their ideas will seem the right way to go.
• Others will be out front.  Perhaps some of the following: Macron, Pope Francis, Putin, Trump, Netanyahu, etc, but they are not men to follow in days like this.  Love them or hate them is not the point.  God commanded mankind to spread out, fill the earth, and trust in Him and not in mankind's collective ability, but humanity still pursues the Tower of Babel—The E.U., the U.N., and towers reaching to the sky all continue to go up as a declaration of our own collective independence from the only One with any real answers.
• Words like volcano, earthquake, radiation, tsunami, hail and meteor will take on meaning like never before, as God steadily increases the pressure.  He loves you and will pay any price for you to wake up and repent, even if many unrepentant, dead men walking must suffer and perish to give you an opportunity (God is sovereign over everyone).

Friends, if you have not put your faith in Christ, please do not wait. When the church is "raptured," that is taken to heaven to be with Christ, you do not want to be left on earth. I have shared what will happen in the time after that great disappearance. It will not be an easy time, it will be a horrible, desolate, destructive time. There will be pain, hurt, suffering, and punishment unlike any other. 

Remember, today is the day of SALVATION:

2 Corinthians 6:2 (NASB)

for He says,

Behold, now is “the acceptable time,” behold, now is “the day of salvation”—

DISCIPLINE: Christianity & America

I like this definition of "discipline:" train oneself to do something in a controlled and habitual way:

Unfortunately, discipline is lacking from society in general, but I see it lacking more dominantly in American society and in most lives of Christians. And I am not immune from this lacking. I have become more aware of the lack of discipline in my life since being diagnosed with gestational diabetes at the beginning of July, But in reality, my awareness of started a few months prior when my OBGYN has my omit carbs from my diet. I was gaining weight a bit too quickly for my pregnancy, and reached the max weight I had gained when preggers with Abigail. 

My first step in getting my weight under control was omitting pretty much all carbs: pasta, bread, cakey sweets,etc. I was still enjoying fruits, in moderation. Basically think lazy keto. I lost weight, baby boy was still growing on target, but I was feeling and looking better. Then I failed the 1 hour glucose test. And then a few days later, I failed the 3 hour glucose test. And my life has been different every since. I had to go hard-core on the carb cutting. The dietitian didn't like that idea, but if I have carbs, my glucose levels spike out of control. I had a great conversation/meeting with the diabetic educator. She told me to try carbs,and if I could manage eating them without spiking great, if not, do what is best for Ari and I. 

So for the last 6 weeks or so, I have been essentially hard-core Keto. No fruits. Very restrictive on veggies. Plenty of meats/proteins, healthy fats, nuts, and good cheeses. Has it been easy? Heavens no! I am essentially eating the anti-American diet. I can't really eat out, unless all I want is a salad with some grilled chicken. I have to cook, meal prep is a must, and since I am eating anti-processed foods, I am going shopping every 3 or 4 days so, instead of 1 time a week. 

And at my last check up, my doctor was happy. My only level (I test 4 times a day) that has been of concern has been my fasting/wake up level. But with more research, and modifying my evening I believe I have taken the steps to get that under control. WITHOUT medication! But it has taken work, and I have to be focused. I have had to keep a good log so if my #'s spike I can figure out what I ate differently. I also live by a clock now. Eat breakfast by a certain point, make sure that I have time for lunch/testing, get in an afternoon snack, eat dinner early enough to have a snack before bed time, but it must be 30 minutes prior to bed, and finally I have to make sure there is 8 hours of fasting after that snack before I test again but before I eat breakfast. 

Its all worth it though. I am doing what is required to keep Ari healthy and myself healthy. And I want to do this as naturally as possible. I had resigned myself midweek last week that I would have to take medication to keep my fasting level in check, but thankfully, after more research I discovered the importance of a protein snack 30 minutes prior to bed. And if I can make that work every day until my my appointment this upcoming Wednesday, I think my doctor will agree. 

Going through this has been having me evaluate my spiritual life. And taking a look at the world around me. I need structure. And when precept is going on at my church, I can tell you my spiritual life is ablaze. When summer comes (and precept ends)...there is still a flame but its not blazing. I need a study, I need something requires me to dig deeper, have homework, come to class prepared. I like studies. I like having something to give my focus too. It helps me. I do well with my prayer life, and meditations, when I don't have a study to focus on. But I will admit that my Bible reading isn't as indepth during that time. But oh boy! Precept starts, I am in the word, I am checking cross references, I blog more (sorry folks, but I am being honest).

And so I have come to realize that the discipline I am exerting in my personal life for my health, I need to exert in my spiritual life. I easily read a few scriptures a day, but God's Word, it is our daily bread. It feeds our soul. Summer time fasting is not what is needed. During the heat (literally and figuratively) we need to eat as well as possible, give our bodies what it needs. And Scripture is the bread of life. We have God's word to sustain us. Yet most of us are not "eating" correctly. A verse or two a day will keep you alive. But when the storms come, the trials....your "fat" stores are going to be low, and you will not last long. But if you are going in depth into God's word, reading more and more each day, overlaying God's word with current events, studying with a passion. You will be ready for the days that are hard.

I wish this lack of discipline I see in myself was a rarity in the christian world. But I feel it is not. Overall, when you look at the world, discipline is the farthest thing from anyone's mind. Society has become about "self" and doing "what feels right." Life is about excess. Governments are taking children from parents for "disciplining," psychiatrist say that telling a child "no" will harm their belief in themselves, and there are so many more examples, just watch the mainstream media.  The word discipline is not in most people's vocabulary anymore. And unfortunately, many in the kingdom are flowing with the world. Scripture tells us this will happen.

Matthew 24:10  (NASB)

10 At that time many will fall away and will betray one another and hate one another.

1 Timothy 4:1 N (NASB)
Apostasy

4 But the Spirit explicitly says that in later times some will fall away from the faith, paying attention to deceitful spirits and doctrines of demons,

Discipline isn't fun. Whether it is a parent discipline a child, or a person restraining themselves from treats/pleasures. It takes work, its hard, and it can be frustrating. But there are generally long term rewards. We discipline our children so they that they learn what is right & wrong, and hopefully they will become adults who are beneficial to society, and biblicaly, they serve the LORD for His glory. I am disciplining myself with my diet so my unborn child will not be overly large, we can avoid a c-section (faster recovery for me), and eventually hopefully not have diabetes as I get older. Remember, God disciplines us too.

Hebrews 12:6 (NASB)

6 For those whom the Lord loves He disciplines,

Discipline is about love.

• we (parents) discipline our children because we love them
• we discipline ourselves with diet/exercise so we can be a better version of ourself (a type of self love - which can go to far)
• God disciplines us, because He loves us.

Discipline is about love. Not harm. And though when the LORD disciplines us it can be painful, it can be uncomfortable, in the end it is for the betterment of ourselves, and His glory. Which is our purpose in life, to bring glory to God. The world, the little "c" church, and America, for sure, all need more discipline. And now is the time, before God's discipline changes to His wrath.