Let the bitterness go.

It's a new year, its a new month, think of January 2014 as a clean slate.

Oh wait, your bitter? Carrying around a grudge...for how long? Not to sound trite, but why? You can't have a clean slate unless you let go of the old.

Now don't get me wrong, I have been bitter before. I am from Texas, born and raised, and Texans give new meaning to the word stubborn. We can hold a grudge until the grudge cry's for mercy. But all children of God need to resolve any bitterness that is lingering in their lives. Bitterness can make you sick. And forgiveness is the cure.

This morning in church I had the privilege of hearing Dr. R.T. Kendall preach. He "served as Pastor of Westminster Chapel in London, England for twenty-five years. He is a powerful expositor of the Scriptures and a great lover of soul's"( per his bio provided by my church). He gave a powerful sermon on forgiveness, correction, Total Forgiveness. Let me tell you, if you have a chance, please check out the podcast on my church's website: fbp.org. What I am going to share will not even come close to comparing to hearing it from that good man.

The scriptures for today were Genesis 45:1-8. The backstory is the story of Joseph up to the 7 year famine that hit Egypt as Joseph interpreted from the dreams of Pharaoh. Joseph at the time is the Prime Minister of Egypt and is about to reveal himself to his 11 brothers. About 22 years prior those 11 brother's were jealous of Joseph (their father Jacob favored Joseph and didn't keep it to himself). On top of that, Joseph was a bit spoiled, prideful, and he was prophetic. He prophesized that one day he would rule over his brothers. So his jealous sibling's sought to kill him, but ended up selling him into slavery. Then they told their father that his favorite son was killed by a wild beast.

Back to the present, the famine is only in year 2 of 7, and Joseph's brother's are in Egypt looking for food (as P.M. of Egypt, Joseph made sure to put food aside for the lean years). They come up to the Prime Master to seek food, unaware of who he is. But Joseph knows who they are. And the old Joseph (the prideful Joseph) would have lorded over is brothers that he had been right. That his dreams did come true. But due to the events of the 22 years, Joseph was not who he once was.

Genesis 45:1-8

New King James Version (NKJV)

Joseph Revealed to His Brothers

45 Then Joseph could not restrain himself before all those who stood by him, and he cried out, “Make everyone go out from me!” So no one stood with him while Joseph made himself known to his brothers. ² And he wept aloud, and the Egyptians and the house of Pharaoh heard it.

³ Then Joseph said to his brothers, “I am Joseph; does my father still live?” But his brothers could not answer him, for they were dismayed in his presence. ⁴ And Joseph said to his brothers, “Please come near to me.” So they came near. Then he said: “I am Joseph your brother, whom you sold into Egypt. ⁵ But now, do not therefore be grieved or angry with yourselves because you sold me here; for God sent me before you to preserve life. ⁶ For these two years the famine has been in the land, and there are still five years in which there will be neither plowing nor harvesting. ⁷ And God sent me before you to preserve a posterity for you in the earth, and to save your lives by a great deliverance. ⁸ So now it was not you who sent me here, but God; and He has made me a father to Pharaoh, and lord of all his house, and a ruler throughout all the land of Egypt.

 

Forgiveness. To forgive someone not only releases them from your bitterness but it releases yourself. The Book of Acts states that you are to pray for your enemy and to bless them. That is true religion. To ask the Lord to bless the one that has hurt you or done you wrong. It goes against our very nature, our flesh nature.

 

But we are not talking about going up to someone and saying, "I forgive you." We are talking about total forgiveness. And that has all to do with you and not much to do with them. How do you know if you have totally forgiven someone? Apply these 7 principles to your life:

 

1. Do not tell anyone what they did to you.
   Joseph sent everyone out; behind closed doors he revealed himself to his brothers, privately. Genesis 45:1, "and he cried out, "Make everyone go out from me!"'
   Joseph didn't want anyone in Egypt to know the story of how he came to Egypt. Joseph was considered a hero, and he wanted his brothers thought of the same way. If  word got out of what his brother's had done to him, they would have been hated.
   If you must talk about what has been done to you follow these guidelines:
1. Choose one person who will listen and listen only.
2. Tell God - He can handle it. Psalm 142:2-
   I pour out my complaint before Him;
   I declare before Him my trouble. 
2. Do not let them fear you.
   Joseph was in a position of power, and that power could have been used to punish his brother's for what they did to him. Instead he wanted to love on them (verse4).
   God is looking for someone not bitter to rise up. Small men want power to fuel vengeance. Small men encourage fear. Marriages would be healed if fingers stopped pointing.
   1 Corinthians 13:5
3. Want them to be free of guilt and self anger.
   Set them free. Forgiveness is not about them, it is about you. Most people who you hold a grudge against never even know they have done you wrong. Don't wait for them to be sorry, you will always be waiting!
   Grudges cause ill. Forgiveness heals!
4. Let them save face.

   Act like you don't know what they did. Put it behind you. Do not rub their noses in it!

   Verse 7 shows how Joseph did this. He let his brother's know that it was God who was in control of them sending Joseph to Egypt. Those who know the Gospel know that God is in control.
5. Protect them from their dark secret.
   Joseph's 11 brothers not only sold him into slavery but they lied to their father. They told him that his favorite son had been killed. Joseph gave his brother's the words to say to Jacob, to keep them safe from their father's wrath. See Genesis 45:9-28.
6. Forgive as long as you live.
   About 17 years later Jacob died, and Joseph's brothers came back to him seeking forgiveness. He did before and he did so again. Sometimes people will doubt that you truly forgave them, anytime they come to you seeking forgiveness give it to them, reassure them.
7. Bless them!
   Read Chapter 45 again. Joseph looked after his entire family. He provided them with a new home, food, clothing and honor.

 

Hearing Dr. Kendall preach this morning was just what this soul needed this first January in 2014. I realized that there were a few people in my past that I still was giving room to in my heart and my mind. I believe I now have forgiven them, totally forgiven them. And when I slip up and start to hold a grudge against them again, I need to turn back to God and remember that as He forgave me I need to again forgive them.