UPDATE: Movie Warning

If you are not sure what this is in response to, please read my post from yesterday. Movie Warning
At the end of my post I indicated that I would be writing Focus on the Family: Plugged In Movie Review about their 4 out 5 rating for the movie Show Dogs. Below you will find my email to them:

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To Whom it May Concern,

 

I am concerned about the rating your establishment gave the movie Show Dogs. It was rated a 4 out 5 for family friendliness. As a mother of two young children, and a 3rd on the way, I use your site to help guide me in what we as a family watch. I have found previously your ratings to be spot on.

 

But with the movie Show Dogs, I think you were too generous. Many of the mom's I am friends with shared on social media a troubling review that essentially says the movie is trying to normalize the grooming for sexual predators. Here is the link to the article:

https://foreverymom.com/arts-entertainment/dog-show-movie-review-grooming/

The movie, from your site's review, would have been one my husband gladly would have taken my 3 year old to see. My husband is a police office, my son talks nothing but about good guys, bad guys, trucks, and dogs. This movie has 3 of his 4 must have's as a 3 year old boy. I am disturbed that your review summarized this troubling scenario mentioned above as:

 

Sexual Content

Some of the female dog handlers wear formfitting, low-cut outfits. A male handler ushers in his dog while shirtless. A trainer offers to let Max breed with his dog. Frank repeatedly cups Max's nether regions (off- camera) to prepare him for the judge's on-stage inspection of him. Max and another female show dog share a "kiss," à la that iconic canine canoodle in Lady and the Tramp.

I don't care that it is off screen. The fact that it is discussed apparently as it is, is appalling. Your conclusion, that this a "kids movie through and through" could not be further from the truth. I have always revered your site, as many women who I look up to relied on your site to help guide them in their parenting. I now can no longer use your site as the guiding site in movie decisions for my family.

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Sometimes, when you take on a task for standing up for yourself, or in this case the innocence of your children, you wonder if it is worth it. Will they even respond? Will they brush it off? In this case, it was worth my time to not only write my original post, but to write Focus on the Family. They did in fact respond to my email, and publicly responded to the outpouring from parents I would assume nation wide. Below is their email response to me:

 

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Thank you, Jessica, for writing to Plugged In, a ministry of Focus on the Family. Your message was forwarded to us here in our Family Help Center, and I’m happy to get back to you.

Your confidence in our ministry means a great deal to us. It was good you took the time to share your disappointment about our Plugged In staff’s recent review of Show Dogs. We appreciate the opportunity to respond to the issues you raised and address the content in the movie that you feel needed more attention in the initial review. A blog by Bob Hoose, our staff member who saw the screening, is now posted on the Plugged In website. We believe you’ll find what Bob has to say beneficial. We also want to let you know that some changes are being made to the review in response to the feedback we’ve received.

As a final thought, we want to emphasize again something Bob stated in his post. Focus takes the subject of child abuse extremely seriously. In fact, in April we aired a broadcast on the topic titled “Protecting Your Child from Sexual Abuse” in order to ensure that parents and other caregivers are alert to this problem and have the tools they need to guard the innocence of those under their supervision. If you didn’t hear this program at the time, we hope you’ll take several minutes to listen via the link above.

Again, we’re glad you contacted us and hope we’ve provided some helpful clarification. May God bless you and your loved ones.

Mia Jones

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I am glad I did receive a response. And I am encouraged that they are responding to the fact that many people, parents, thought the review was lacking. I did take the time to read the blog by Bob Hoose, the staff member who saw the screening. And for the most part I like his response, but some things still irked me. Case in point.

 

The movie is about a police dog that goes undercover as a contestant in a show dog competition. And as part of the process, the judges have to inspect the animal’s private parts (that’s a part of real dog shows, by the way). Since Max the cop dog has never been through this process, his human trainer tries to prepare him for being examined in that way—much to Max’s chagrin. They tell him to try not to think about it and go to his “zen” place. It’s played as a growl and snap joke in the movie.

 

I honestly do not care if an inspection of animal private parts is how it is done in real life, I feel that Focus on the Family is missing the point. This part of the movie didn't need to be in the movie. How can I teach my child about her private box (PARENTING: Hard Work and Worth It!), and that it is private, when a movie makes light of it, and that part seems to be glossed over by reviewers. Now Mr. Hoose is right, people view life/movies/music through their own filter of experience. Like Mrs. Maldonado, I am a survivor of sexual abuse, and I am somewhat hyper vigilant to scenarios like this in movies, the news, books. But, I don't think that we necessarily saw this through that survivor's filter. We saw it through the filter of being mom's who are well aware and highly informed about what is going on in society. Honestly, anything made by Hollywood, I am suspicious of. Sexual scandals abound more and more we hear about the abuses going on, and everything that comes from Hollywood is over sexualized. I still do not understand at the age of 32 what a half naked woman or man has to do with selling perfume. 

 

Mr. Hoose shared: As I was writing this blog, a colleague of mine took a phone call on the issue. The caller—a mom—had some concerns about the review. Once we explained what we try to do in our reviews, including this one, she understood, and she added that the whole controversy actually inspired her to talk with her own kids about sexual abuse. That’s a wonderful reaction, I think. Whatever take we have on this movie, whether we see it or not, I applaud Maldonado for talking with her own children about these very important topics the movie made her consider. I applaud our caller for—even though neither she  nor her children had seen the movie at all—opening up this line of dialogue in her own family. Whatever the movie’s intent was, these are important conversations to have. And safe kids and safe families are definitely on the top of both our lists.

I do agree with this, this movie is giving families an open venue to have this difficult conversation. I am still not appeased though with the nonchalant feeling about the scenes in question. And I might have to resolve myself to this fact. I know my family will not be seeing this movie, and based on the comments to my post on Facebook, and the private messages I have received, many in my circle of friends and community will not be seeing it either. And that might just have to be enough, for now.

Movie Warning

I am not a helicopter mom by any means. My kids do not have me hovering over them all day every day. I let them breathe, I let them learn, I let them play, I let them have consequences. I am not raising them to stay my babies forever, but to become responsible adults who not only will function in society but contribute in a positive manner.

And part of that is sheltering them from some of the ills of the world. As they get older it is harder and harder (and I say that with them being only 3 and 5). I know I cannot wrap them in bubble wrap and isolate them. They have to be exposed to humanity and society to some degree so that when they are no longer under my roof they don't rebel and become trouble makers ransacking society. But, at this young age, there are still many things they do not need to be exposed to. In time we will have conversations, but when they are old enough and mature enough - and for each child that will vary. Boys and Girls age/mature differently, so a conversation I have with my daughter at age 9 might not happen until age 11 with my son.

This is not my normal post. We do watch movies, my husband and I, and we do let our kids watch movies. Princess's, super hero's, Disney classics, Bible stories, it runs the gauntlet on what my littles can watch. They don't watch a movie every day, we have dedicated play time, book time, and weather permitting, we send them outside to get hot and sweaty, and a bit stinky. My daughter has gone to the theater 3 times now, my son twice. It is a treat, and one we try to make happen in the summer for sure, to break up the routine a bit. When it comes to the movies we go to, my husband and I try to pick one that we ourselves will enjoy, but that the kids will understand.

I heard about a movie yesterday, that from the outside looking in, we totally would have taken our kids to! The movie is called "Show Dogs." IMDB gives this description of the movie:

Max, a macho, solitary Rottweiler police dog is ordered to go undercover as a primped show dog in a prestigious Dog Show, along with his human partner, to avert a disaster from happening.
IMDB: Show Dogs

It sounds super fun, and I know my 3 year old would love it: police and dogs! It is right up his alley!

But the article I read yesterday paints a different light on the movie, and it is something that cannot be ignored:

It all started out fine, she says:

“The premise is great for a kids movie.  Max is a talking police dog (voiced by Ludacris) who is paired up with a human partner, Frank (Will Arnett) to infiltrate a prestigious dog show and rescue a kidnapped baby panda.  Being a tough dog from New York, Max has no business competing in a dog show but uses his street smarts to outperform the competition to get closer to the inner circle of kidnappers.  Along the way, Max learns lessons about trust and the need to accept help from others.  The usual hilarity ensues with dog farts, bites on the rear-end, and slap-stick bonks to the head which elicit giggles from the audience. “

It’s when Max the police dog learns what he has to do to truly go undercover and be accepted as a legitimate show dog that the trouble with this movie starts. WHAT does Max (and apparently all the show dogs) have to submit to?
Having his private parts touched and inspected. Yep. Maldonado continues:

“What could have been solely a fun movie for kids that would get my highest recommendation is damaged by a dark and disturbing message hidden, not so subtly between the fluffy dogs and glamorous parties of the show dog lifestyle.  As part of any dog show, contestants are judged on their abilities and physical attributes.  One part, in particular, is the inspection of the dog’s private parts.”

Max, of course, is  NOT cool with this, and when his partner Frank and a former champion show dog try to get him to accept this process, a certain dark and very dangerous theme for kids emerges. Maldonado explains:

“Since the inspection of the private parts will happen in the finals, Frank touches Max’s private parts to get him use to it.  Of course, Max doesn’t like it and snaps at Frank for him to stop.  Max is then told by the former champion, who has been through the process before, that he needs to go to his “zen place” while it happens so he can get through it.  More attempts are made by Frank to touch Max’s private parts, but Max is still having trouble letting it happen and keeps snapping at him.”

Max needs to get it together, see, and LET PEOPLE TOUCH HIS PRIVATE PARTS, or he might lose the competition and fail at his mission to rescue the kidnapped panda.
Do you see what’s happening here? Max’s success is riding on whether or not he lets both his partner (for practice) and a stranger (the competition judge) touch his private parts.

IN A KIDS MOVIE. WHAT???
Newsflash, folks: THIS IS CALLED GROOMING and it’s what sexual predators do to kids!
It gets worse. Maldonado describes the movie’s dramatic dog show finals scene:

The day of the finals come and if Max doesn’t let his private parts be touched, he may lose the competition and any hope of finding the kidnapped panda.  It all rests on his ability to let someone touch his private parts.  The judge’s hands slowly reach behind Max and he goes to his “zen place”.  He’s flying through the sky, dancing with his partner, there are fireworks and flowers-everything is great-all while someone is touching his private parts.

So a stranger touches Max’s privates and it MUST feel good because Max has gone to his happy place while being fondled.
UMMM. NO.
Maldonado saw the movie with not only her kids, but her husband and her mother too. After the movie, all three adults felt uncomfortable with the “private parts” stuff. She says:

During the movie, I kept thinking, “This is wrong, it doesn’t need to be in a kids movie. Everything else in the movie is good fun except for this.”  Afterward, my husband mentioned that he picked up on this message too, as did my mother who saw the movie with us.  Dog Show Movie Review

Numerous mom friends of mine on social media have been sharing the warning not to take your children to this movie. And I have to concur. I was curious though what Focus on the Family: Plugged In Movie Review had to say. I was shocked.

Conclusion

Show Dogs is a kids' movie through and through. If you consider its story and presentation on a graduated scale—say, one that ranges from whine and scratch on the low end all the way up to a family pleasing tail-wag peak—this pic probably qualifies as a Saturday-matinee chew toy that lands on the less-enthusiastic, flea-bitten side of the scale. It feels like a talking-dog version of Miss Congeniality: a canine caper the youngsters will giggle at even as parents roll their eyes wearily.
On the plus side, it actually has plenty of action and less doggy doo-doo humor than I expected. And in the negative column, there are some extended dog-private-parts-inspection moments and a couple uses of the word "d--n" that really should have been left on the cutting room floor.
Your kids will likely think it's silly and fun. But whatever you do, I'd suggest you leave your family dog at home. 'Cause he'd never forgive you.  Plugged In: Show Dogs

They gave the movie a 4 out 5 for family friendliness. I really am shocked. I visit their site to get an idea of movies my husband and I are considering for our kids, and I feel this is a major letdown. All they shared about the above is this:

Sexual Content

Some of the female dog handlers wear formfitting, low-cut outfits. A male handler ushers in his dog while shirtless. A trainer offers to let Max breed with his dog. Frank repeatedly cups Max's nether regions (off-camera) to prepare him for the judge's on-stage inspection of him. Max and another female show dog share a "kiss," à la that iconic canine canoodle in Lady and the Tramp.

They summarize the grooming of a "person" to accept fondling by another in one sentence. I am sorry, but that is wrong. My family and I will NOT be seeing this movie, and I plan on writing to Focus on the Family and letting them know that this movie is not appropriate for anyone, but ESPECIALLY children.

While my children are young, and I make a majority of decisions for them, I will do what I can to shelter them from thinking things like this are normal.

LEGACY: Impact on Men on Families & Society

Have you ever seen the movie"Courageous" by the Kendrick brothers? I highly recommend everyone watch it. Married, never married, divorced, have no children, or do.

Honor Begins at Home

Four men, one calling: To serve and protect. As law enforcement officers, Adam Mitchell, Nathan Hayes, David Thomson, and Shane Fuller are confident and focused. Yet at the end of the day, they face a challenge that none of them are truly prepared to tackle: fatherhood.

While they consistently give their best on the job, good enough seems to be all they can muster as dads. But they're quickly discovering that their standard is missing the mark.

When tragedy hits home, these men are left wrestling with their hopes, their fears, their faith, and their fathering. Can a newfound urgency help these dads draw closer to God ... and to their children?

Filled with action-packed police drama, COURAGEOUS is the fourth film from Sherwood Pictures, the moviemaking ministry of Sherwood Baptist Church in Albany, Georgia. Viewers will once again find themselves laughing, crying, and cheering as they are challenged and inspired by everyday heroes who long to be the kinds of dads that make a lifelong impact on their children.

Protecting the streets is second nature to these men. Raising their children in a God-honoring way? That's courageous. (Courageous the Movie)

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The title song for the movie by Casting Crowns, I love it.And in my pregnant condition, it makes me cry. It stirs my heart and overwhelms me.Take a moment to watch it.

Couragous - Casting Crowns

In America, and the world today, there is major crisis. That crisis is the lack of fathers/men in the lives of their children/families.

Prager University has a video on the importance of black fathers, but they share some statistics on fatherhood in general that makes it worth watching: Prager U: Father Video

Children who grow up without a father are:

• 5x more likely to live in poverty & commit crime
• 9x more likely to drop out of school
• 20x more likely to go to prison

Statistics on unwed mothers:

• In 1960, 5% of children grew up in a home with a mother and father not married to each other.
• In 1980, it was 18%
• 2000 it was 33%
• By 2015, that increased to 44%

This issue, this lack of men in the family, crosses generations, races, and economic boundaries. Now it might be more noticeable in certain communities, but this issue effects everyone. There are those on the extreme left who say, "The future is WOMAN!" I have issue with that. God made man and woman both in His likeness. God doesn't make mistakes, He made man and woman to fulfill His plan for creation. Both serve a purpose. Humanity needs both men and women, no matter what science says.

I look around my own life and so the evidence of the importance of men. I am blessed that in spite of my parent's divorce when I was 2.5 years old, my mother eventually married another man, who for the past 24 years has been an amazing influence in my life, and now I can say in my children's life. The day I walked down the isle, both my father and "step" father walked me down the isle to wed my husband. While my mother and father did not make life work together, them and my "step" father worked together in raising me. And, maybe I am a bit biased, but I think I turned out rather well.

My mother/father in-loves have been married around 40 years, raised 3 sons to adulthood, and now have 5 grandchildren with my unborn child being their 6th. The 3 sons talk to each other, us 3 sister-in-loves talk too. We are stronger for these bonds.

Let's look at the Reverend Billy Graham, a tangible example almost everyone the world over can look to. He passed away on February 21, and the world will not be the same with him in Heaven. But the legacy  he left, it cannot be underplayed. I have followed the teachings of his daughter Anne for several years now, and on April 12 was blessed to hear his daughter Ruth speak at woman's event at my church. And should the LORD tarry through November, I hope to hear in person his 3rd daughter Gigi speak. These three ladies and his sons have taken up the torch their father lit and and running the race that Jesus set as an example:

Hebrews 12:1-3 (NASB)
Jesus, the Example
12 Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

3 For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

Friends, there are many heartaches in this world.

February 14 - Parkland, Florida
February 21 - Billy Graham passed away
April 8 -Chemical attack in Syria
April 17 - Former First Lady Barbra Bush passed away
April 27 - Alfie Evans dies
April 30 - Israel exposes Iran Lies

Death, destruction, lies.

It is only going to get worse. My pastor preached tonight the midweek sermon. Normally his son does, but food poisoning (send up a prayer). Our pastor and his wife just returned from a trip to the Holy Land with 82 other church members. And his sermon tonight shared what I have learned the past 8 months about Christianity.

Here are some of my sermon notes:

In Israel, there are 13.5 million people: 7 million Palestinians & 6.5 Jews,numbers released by the Israeli military a few weeks ago.
Of those 13.5 million people, 1% of those are Christians, and in the Holy City, Jerusalem, that number is less than 1%.

He added that America is heading towards a society that shares that statistic. With everything going on in our country, and the world, faith in Christ is declining, knowledge of who Christ is is declining. And unless the men of the world come to faith in Christ, society will continue to crumble. Men serving God and not themselves will be what changes our world. Jesus could tarry and not Rapture the church if the men in this country, in the world, grew up, manned up, and became men who serve God. A man who serves the LORD puts God firs, then his family, then himself. He works hard, is active in church/community, is a present in the lives of his children, and shows his children love by serving/loving his wife. A man who marries a woman, usually brings them both out of poverty. Men make a world of difference. We need to appreciate what men are capable of doing.

Prager U has another great video that outlines the benefits of men marrying. Prager U: Be a Man, Get Married

Let me wrap up. The future is not man, is not woman, it is both working together to fulfill God's will. We need to stop down playing the importance of men in society and the world. Scripture tells us that a day is coming when the church will no longer be here, and the wrath of the God will be poured out on humanity. We do not know when that day will come. So until then, we need to pray, we need to share the Gospel, share what Jesus has done in our lives, and remember that God wins in the end. And because we do not know the day, or the hour, we must live as if we have time, even though we are aware that we do not know for sure how long we have. Ladies, pray for the men in your lives, and in the lives of your children. Men, seek God first, lead your families by example.

A Note for Women Raising Children with out Fathers:

Dear Sister,

You are amazing, you are loved, you are not alone. You are doing the best you can, in a situation God never intended for any of His beloved children. Remember, we live in a fallen and dying world. God will be father to the fatherless. Keep moving forward. Do what you can to set the example of Christ in your home. Find men (preachers, pastors, grandfathers, uncles) who can be an example to your children. Boys and girls alike need to see what men are supposed to be like. And remember, our heavenly Father loves our children even more than we do. We have to trust them into His hands. He has given them to us to raise, but ultimately they are not ours. Hang in there. You are prayed for.